In my last post, I shared that after months of pushing against the river–trying to control outcomes and clinging to the familiar–I finally hit a wall and took three weeks to completely step back. It became so much more than a pause; I recalibrated.
Finding Self-Compassion and Quiet
I first stepped away into the quiet of the mountains–away from screens, schedules, and daily demands. On a hike during those early days, I found myself climbing through small spaces between massive boulders, unsure where I’d emerge–a physical metaphor for how I’d been navigating worries and hurdles, just hoping to pop out where the sun might find me. But later on, a ferret-like bundle of adorableness put things in perspective. I watched this little thing carry a fish the size of its body across a patch of grass. It let me know- it’s possible to do big things.
The turning point came at the river. I waded in and dunked myself into the biting cold water. When I emerged, it felt as though a compassionate hand had gently wiped off the grime of my senses. The frantic internal dialogue that had been running in the background for months went quiet. A sweet sense of peace washed over me. My body and mind were being heard and respected- and because of that, they could finally rest.
Rediscovering Play
Once the white noise cleared, I sampled from the buffet of simple living. I watched hummingbirds hover in the afternoon light, worked on puzzles, practiced archery with my bow and arrows, and went on slow, agenda-free walks. There was nothing quite as sweet as paddleboarding on the glassy, quiet waters of Stanley Lake, drifting near the edges of eagle territory with mountain ranges framing the horizon.
With minimal interaction with others, I was learning to enjoy my own company and, like the trees around me, learning to simply be.
Renewed Intention
During the final days, I deliberately explored a better way to resurface. Through books, art, listening to wise voices, and my own intuition, a few important messages kept coming up:
- Refuse to cooperate with worry. Fear screams. Wisdom whispers.
- Be brave. Accept who you are, let go of what is not yours, and find what is possible.
- The divine is a tree away.
- Rethink effort- does this further my path? Does this have benefit? If not, clear it out.
- Whatever you do, be kind, playful, curious, intentional, and loving.
An Invitation to Take a Breath
If you are reading this while running on absolute emotional fumes, consider this your friendly, compassionate nudge to pause. We live in a culture that treats rest like a luxury reward you only get after finishing an endless to-do list. But rest isn’t a trophy for productivity–it is the baseline requirement for staying human, creative, and connected.
What might happen if you gave yourself permission to step back–even for a single afternoon, an evening, or an unhurried walk in the woods? When you stop managing outcomes and allow yourself to simply exist, you make room to:
Hear Your Own System: Your body is constantly sending memos, emails, and sometimes full marching band performances to let you know what it needs. Stepping back allows you to listen before a burnout forces a collapse.
Come Back to Your Senses: Constant overstimulation dulls our capacity to savor life. Resting wipes the grime off the window so color, warmth, and simple pleasures can return.
Discover What’s Waiting: When you stop clinging to control, you open up space for curiosity, play, and quiet wisdom to whisper what comes next.
You don't need to head into the wilderness or pause your whole life to begin. Start by stepping away from the screen, putting your feet on the grass, taking a slow breath, and asking yourself: What does my mind, body, and soul need right now? Sometimes the bravest, most productive thing you can do is simply stop, listen, and savor a chance to just ‘be’.
By the way, a new member has joined my team!
During an art activity, sitting on a shelf, staring right at me, was "Butters"–a soft, weighted, lavender-scented black-and-white barnyard cow. This little bundle now sits within reach in my office to offer grounding hugs during heavy sessions.